If you haven't experienced it, then you will never understand it. If you're lucky enough not to have it, you will never truly grasp the reality of it. That is mental illness.
We're most probably aware of depression, one of society's most pressing issues today. It's an immense feeling of sadness and isolation. There's a strong urge to just isolate and distance oneself from everyone else. This kind of mental illness stems from genetics, chemical imbalance, and traumatic events like a terrible heartbreak.
Heartbreak depression is real and is said to be under what's called in the medical community as "situational depression". It's a short-term and stress-related type of depression which develops after experiencing a traumatic event. It's a type of adjustment disorder that makes it hard to adjust to life following that specific traumatic event.
Just like depression and any other mental illness, there are a few ways to help you go through your tough journey.
- Feel everything and let it all out.
Never let yourself bottle up your feelings. If there's one unhealthy thing to do for your heart and mind, it's not allowing yourself to feel. If you feel happy, smile your biggest smile, leap in excitement, squeal and shout — go for it. If you feel mad, go somewhere you could be noisy and shout at the top of your lungs and release the anger you are feeling. If you're sad and heartbroken, then so be it. Cry and mope until the very last tear you can shed and let out all the sadness in your body. It's a form of healing like no other. Just make sure that you have a specific time period.
Example: When I'm extremely sad, I allow myself to cry everything out all night for just one night. One time, I let myself cry only five minutes a day for a week. It doesn't mean I won't feel sad for the rest of the day or the next few days and weeks, but I do feel lighter and it gets better everyday.
- Distract yourself.
It's a good idea to do some activities or dive into hobbies that help you shift your focus on different things other than sad memories or your own thoughts. You can workout, jog, learn some arts & crafts, make music, bake cookies, hang out with friends, etc. Not only will this distract you from the heartbreak you are feeling, but it also helps you feel more connected with your body, other people and the world which is both physically and mentally healthy. Sweat it all out, release your creative juices, and have fun.
- Seek professional guidance.
It's okay to ask for help. It's actually the right thing to do. Go to therapy and be guided. Even when you think you already know yourself, there are still things that are waiting to be discovered. Sometimes we fail to put two and two together, and that is where the therapist or psychologist comes in — they help us realize something that we might have overlooked. You will understand what exactly makes you happy and sad and you will have a clearer version of your life which can help turn your life around. It's so much easier to get through this battle when there's someone you could talk to who has profound knowledge, understanding and helpful advice. Once you are aware of how you feel and what triggers them, you'll know what to do to feel better and the power is now in your hands.
- Open up to your family and friends.
When going through something like this, it's way easier to lean on your loved ones for support. It's easier when you know you're not alone, and family will always be with you every step of the way. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable because it's what helps you open up and get the comfort you need from the people you love. Sharing your thoughts and feelings to them is letting them understand even a little bit of how much you feel. Don't let distance tear your personal relationships apart. The comfort of knowing you are not alone brings hope, and hope is very powerful thing to have.
- Have a constant reminder why you should keep fighting.
Sometimes, there are sentimental things that inspire or motivate us. It could be a family picture, a letter from someone you love, or a symbolic object. One of the symbolic objects that is popular these days is the Semicolon Ring. The semicolon is a symbol used by writers to pause in a sentence, instead of using a period which ends it.
In this case, the sentence represents your life. This ring will hopefully remind you that when life gets a tad bit overwhelming, just pause, take a breath and get up again. Life is too beautiful for you not to experience it. So don’t give up, don’t end things just like that. If you fancy this ring as much as we do, you go ahead and shop now.
It’s sad to say that heartbreak depression is painfully real. And you know what they say, pain demands to be felt. I wish we could all wish it away every 11:11 or with every shooting star that passes above us. But according to Robert Frost, “the only way out is through”. It’s a learning journey where you will be able to discover things about yourself and of life which will help you live to the fullest once you get past this obstacle. Always remember that you are strong, it’s going to be okay, and you are not alone. Keep fighting!